Sitting uncomfortably in a plastic chair, with the strong smell of harvested coffee beans around me, tears well in my eyes.
I’m just thirteen years old; I’m out of my comfort zone on a medical mission trip in Nicaragua, shadowing one of the physician assistants, when a girl seeming to be my age approaches and completely throws me off guard. She has a tiny newborn on her arm. A sickening sense of fear and anxiety seeps through her skin and burrows deep within me. I want to hug her, console her, and maybe make her laugh for just a brief moment, but I can’t. I barely know more Spanish than “gracias,” and I can’t figure out how to connect with this girl who has a life so different from my own. I feel that heavy lump in my chest tightening.
This girl, only fourteen, has given birth to the baby in her arms and fears she may be pregnant with another. I ask myself, “How is this right? How is it okay for a child to have to raise another child and completely abandon her own innocence?” I feel sick. I feel sick to this day when I look back on it.
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The unlucky girl leaves to take a pregnancy test, and I get to hold her precious child. I never realized before this moment that a baby, so infinitesimally small, could cause such an immense change inside me. I feel my heart shatter, then melt, and then try to put itself back together and forget this tragedy. I can’t forget. I have since realized that I never want to forget. It is not fair of me to forget.
I had thought my struggles seemed so uniquely looming and important until that moment. Looking into that baby’s gigantic, glossy eyes made me realize that I could just as easily have been his mother. Who says I deserved to be born into the country and family that I was? Who says I deserve an education more than this girl? Who says I have more of a right to know what childhood is like? I escaped her fate by sheer luck.
I become so miserably angry at the world for the hours, days, and even months that follow. Eventually, I tell myself I need to stop whining about something I can’t control. I realize that instead of letting this injustice bring me down, I should take advantage of my situation. I plan to do so by continuing my education, and I have no intention of keeping that privilege to myself.
I believe in taking full advantage of the opportunities we are given to help those who were dealt fewer. Because any one of us could have been just as unlucky.
References
- UNICEF – The Convention on the Rights of the Child
- World Health Organization – Adolescent Development
- The World Bank – Investing in Human Capital
- NCBI – Adolescent Pregnancy and its Consequences
- World Health Organization – Adolescent Pregnancy Fact Sheet
- ChildFund International – Advocating for Children’s Rights
- Youth Policy Labs – Global Database on Youth Policies and Programmes
- United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs – World Population Prospects: Data Query
