Once upon a time when you were younger did self—doubt creep in for days & months at a time and eventually it swiftly turns to depression before you know it your somewhere in your room feeling alone balled up in a circle wondering why are these things happening to you? I believe that majority of high school students go through depression at some time in their teenage years Today the way society is set up they grow up to the mindset that the world is on their shoulders & they can do nothing to fix it, but in reality there are people here to help you. My behavior intervention teacher once said “we all have to believe that it’s more to life then blending in why keep trying to be the same as others, when you get out of that stage of repeating the same denial that you are not in the wrong & you‘re doing no harm to the others around with the uncontrolled acts that you continually repeat over & over eventually you’ll notice that you are living on a caracal”.
So, with that being said when you notice that you stress yourself out knowing that this isn’t you & you could do better & you start to notice that you don’t want to be affiliated with the crucial comments but, what you do not realize you put it on yourself as a TEENAGER a young person with little to no knowledge cause we just started living We find every reason to go against the approval of other people because we want to do it our way that’s just us. Secondly, I just want to say depression is a big factor you‘re going through puberty, plus you might be going through a hectic life at home, Personally I know that feeling for the past few months have been really bad I lost my mother October, 23, 2017 that really broke me put me past the word depression. High school is full of pure hurt honestly that’s part of the reason I feel as if we go through a lot throughout teenage years cause our bodies are changing people are coming in & out of our life which gives me every reason to believe it majority of my friends have went through Sr still is currently facing depression.
Throughout, my life I’ve experienced lots of erotic behavior towards & against me when it comes to the word depression for example, I’ve had multiple friends at the point of suicide in their life because the simple fact is they are clueless and they don’t know what they really want to do they just know that they want to get somewhere in in life but they hit a hard wall like rape, parents divorcing , charges against them even bullying from the people they truly thought was there friend and I have some friends where there life was never good they just act like an character at school just to cope with the fact that they aren’t okay nowadays the way we think is that if we can‘t find or be in the place we generally we want to be in when we get to that mark where we are about to hit the finish line we start to freak out and think we are hopeless I’ve had a friend that they never had the best life growing up they got sexually assaulted as they were younger they got teased throughout elementary.
Through middle school and then while they were in middle school they had a really bad death in the family and it started to break their family apart it honestly killed them to death I watched the tears the pain in their eyes the desperation for attention from a love pone which they never got so when they got to high school they totally changed nothing was the same the wardrobe the accent everything you could ever think of they had hatred in their heart for everything they once loved I still talk to him this day and I swear he still is depressed but I’m there for him because honestly we have some things in common life isn’t easy never will be I never expected it to be but this pain inside my heart helps me reveal and helps me come to contact with reality and who I truly am there‘s more to life I’m willing to stay here into my god calls me home sometimes we feel as if we have to help and we have to pick up the pieces where our parents left off but we do not realize is that is not true at all I’m here to learn cause I lost my all .
July 215‘ I will be 16 years old without my providing parent without what I need most depression sometimes seems as if it’s my only hope to be down to not be happy but I‘ve came to reality that death is something one day us all are going to have to come into contact with I feel like I have to make it out I have to make something of myself to prove that I’m more than what people think of me Depression is all the pain that has drowned me in self-pity and pain all my life is like something coming out of my closet of nightmares and past sit just waiting for me 8t when I see them there I get stuck a big lump in my throat but ever since I started going to therapy 8: it’s like it all goes away but at night time it haunts me and Ijust sit in the darkness wonder when will happiness become a full time job and my heartbreaks will never be non-existent I’ve come to the truth that pain is everywhere you choose who you hurt for I haven’t found that in myself have you?