What am I doing with my life, in high school? What do I believe about myself, what do I believe about others? What is my future? All these questions at some point will be asked by any given person, this semester we have looked at these questions and been challenged to think critically about these things and that which we believe. The lessons that have stood out most to me are the TED talk and reading on grit.
They spoke about something which I find myself falling in two polar directions, not working hard enough, or not being able to accept and cope with failure. Trial and error a phrase I had heard fairly often when I was in elementary school, less in middle school and hardly at all now. Through this reading on grit and the trials of a Navy SEAL in training and failure of training as well as experience, I have learned this semester that unforeseen circumstances are not failures. They are not unfortunate circumstances or closed doors but rather they are fortuitous opportunities to learn and grow and find new doors open to. “In life, you will face a lot of Circuses.
You will pay for your failures. But, if you persevere, if you let those failures teach you and strengthen you, then you will be prepared to handle life’s toughest moments.”(McRaven, 51) The Circus in and of life is inevitable and it takes more strength to fail than it does to succeed. It takes more strength to persevere through the circus than it does to avoid it. “Failure had a price” (McRaven, 49)
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Every action one makes has a price, while the immediate price of failure seems significant in the grand scheme of things if one turns a failure into an opportunity it is a price well paid. “It’s all practice for now, for now, it’s all practice.”(Currier) As a person who would quite easily identify themselves as being quite lazy these lessons on grit were an inspirational wake-up call in that success is widely based off of one’s own mindset. “Grit is usually unrelated or even inversely related to measures of talent…The ability to learn is not fixed it can change with your effort.” (Duckworth)
A psychologist did a study to find who was successful in certain situations and found this is what she found. “One characteristic emerged as a significant predictor of success. And it wasn’t social intelligence. It wasn’t good looks, physical health and it wasn’t IQ. It was grit.”(Duckworth) This may have been the most useful and inspirational thing I had learned this semester. It had practical application to life and has changed the way I look at myself. Instead of automatically telling myself I can not do something because I lack a talent or skill to do so I now think about this with a newfound understanding that if I persevere and put significant effort into a goal I may be able to achieve it even if it seems unaccomplishable. Grit is not giving up persevering even when one may not be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.“ I sometimes fell short of being the best, but I never fell short of giving it my best.”(McRaven, 53)
Through these lessons on grit, I learned that to truly be successful may not be to have the best grade or the greatest outcome but to have tried my hardest. More can be learned through failure than success. “They’re much more likely to persevere when they fail because they don’t believe that failure is a permanent condition”(Duckworth)
At certain points in the semester I have felt like giving up on things and have given up simply because it seemed too hard. This lesson helped me think more rationally and long-term, in a sense perhaps it could be said they instilled in me a concept of hope. One thing I believe people with a gritty mentality always seem to possess is hope. They have an expectation for the future and that makes them continue to push through. They work past their struggles and generally speaking think rationally and with optimism in their situation. I have seen this characteristic among most people in Notre Dame especially my teachers and friends. They form a supportive community and their own sense of hope for themselves gives me a sense of hope.
This semester in the transition from middle school to high school I have learned that it is important to have a community and so in learning about the hallmarks I found that hallmark 6 stood out to me a lot. “We Create Community Among Those with Whom we Work and with Those we Serve” relationships are important especially with those with whom you live with every day. “ Your swim buddy helped you study, kept you motivated, and became your closest ally throughout training. And, as swim buddies, if one of you failed an event, both of you suffered the consequences.”(McRaven, 46)
In the same way that food is better with family, grit is better with a group. Through group projects and lectures on how to choose to keep and maintain relationships this semester, I have learned the importance of good relationships. “What I do know is that talent doesn’t make you gritty. Our data shows very clearly that there are many talented individuals who simply do not follow through on their commitments.” (Duckworth)
A good friend is always there to keep you accountable and on the right path. They will keep each other in check and following through with their commitments motivating you as a close ally like a swim buddy. Through the TED talk and reading on grit this semester I have learned how to think critically about situations and have been given an idea of what makes a person successful. How one’s own mentality and sense of hope is a main decisive factor in the outcome of their life and future. This semester I learned that failures and mistakes are just opportunities and lessons in disguise. “To play a wrong note is insignificant; to play without passion is inexcusable.”(Beethoven)
