Table of Contents
Aggressive behavior at home isn’t generally the same as Domestic Violence. It includes psychological mistreatment as well as physical injuries like a black eye, broken nose and broken bones. This is one way to show control because not all injuries leave bruises sometimes you get internal bruising. The reason why it is an issue is because women and children witnessing Domestic Violence fear for their lives and are told you can’t call for help because there is no physical marks and they won’t believe you. Children are developmentally scarred for life.
Domestic Violence and the effect it has on a child’s developmental and learning delays. The reason why I am concerned as well as many other mothers is because my son is living proof that developmental and learning delays exist as well as behaviors and adjustments The problem is that because I am currently in a Domestic Violence Marriage my son has the following problems as a result of the years of abuse in my marriage major anxiety problems and feels the need to be my protector from his father instead of being a child, he eats excessively because of the psychological abuse, he has a hard time sleeping if the father is not home and was drinking, worried because of the unknown, constantly scared of the verbal abuse, his grades aren’t nowhere close to being where it needs to be.
He tries to play Superman when his dad is verbally abusing/beating on me he tries to step in and come to my rescue, but as a mother I am afraid he might get hurt in the crossfire. The passion I have on this subject is one of making sure these offenders are held accountable for their actions (Antle, B., Barbee, A., Yankeelov, P., & Bledsoe, L. 2010)
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Studies
The Understanding Agency and Resistance Strategies, UNARS) with children and young people in Greece, Italy, Spain and the UK, who had experienced domestic violence. According to the studies they conducted from creating a special room that children can go in and share their experiences in witnessing domestic violence where the researchers would go to actually listen to their interpretation of what their experiences were and how they communicated it. (Trevarthen 1998) According to the Domestic Abuse Project, Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women in the United States studies show that domestic violence occurs to one in four women and claims a life in the United States every 6 hours meaning a women is violently attacked every 15 seconds. (DAP, 2016)
History/Theory
Aggressive Behavior is Domestic Violence it is not love in fact it is far from it. Domestic Violence doesn’t discriminate it affects the rich, poor, educated, white-collar, blue-collar. It also does not discriminate locations from the happiest place on earth (Disneyland), Paradise(Hawaii), & France, especially with children witnessing Domestic Violence is a problem all over the world and in my opinion it is because of the clashing personalities that are involved and the cycles of abuse that the offender has witnessed as a child maybe even a chemical imbalance.
I have been a victim of domestic violence for 6 years and that is why I found myself a mother going nowhere with no college education, so in 2016 I also found myself in a near death situation at the hands of my husband all the while being witnessed by my at the time 9 year old son who has been robbed of any chance of being a normal child because of the traumatizing event.
My husband was arrested and because it’s been years of mental abuse I chose not to press charges that was where I was programmed to not say anything. I was quickly put in my place by the state’s prosecutor because they informed me that at that point they are taking over and pressing charges. My son and I were subpoenaed and had to show up at his court appearance which gave the both of us anxiety to where we didn’t end up sleeping at all.
The problem was that the people that I thought were supposed to protect me and my son did not and that is why today he continues to mentally abuse my son and I whenever he drinks. The courts, prosecutors, probation officers, programs/agencies in the end did nothing my husband was charged with 4 felonies terroristic threatening, abuse of a household member in front of a minor, interference with a 911 call, while being arrested he had an altercation with H.P.D. (5 officers) because when you have liquid courage you feel as if nothing can stop you or take you down it is like someone on meth or strung out on drugs.
In the end the 4 felonies were changed to misdemeanors because at the time he was the only one working and he had a guard card for his job at the time and one of the requirements is you cannot have any felonies and because he was the sole provider the state decided to change it so that he could still keep his job, but would be required to take all kinds of classes. Plus 1 year of probation.
I did not agree to the terms at the time because I did not understand that at the time I felt that it was a slap on the hand and basically being told don’t do it again, but in my Political Science 322 class Professor Ashida said that it’s better to get any charge than him not getting anything, so they felt at least he got something rather than being let off with just classes, but it was just like they gave him exactly that because the agency that does the anger management classes told him that “Mr. Younce you don’t have an anger problem, the problem is your wife so he didn’t have to go to anger management his parenting classes he could do basically all of them in 2 sessions everyone who was supposed to help me treated him as if he was the victim when in fact it was the total opposite.
Some of the Short Term Effects of Domestic Violence on children
Children in homes where one parent is abused may feel fearful and anxious. They may always be on guard, wondering when the next violent event will happen. This can cause them to react in different ways, depending on their age.
Statistics
Preschool aged children who witness Domestic violence
According to women’s health.gov on the effects of Domestic Violence on Children studies show that Children in preschool. Young children who witness intimate partner violence may start doing things they used to do when they were younger, such as bed-wetting, thumb-sucking, increased crying, and whining. They may also develop difficulty falling or staying asleep; show signs of terror, such as stuttering or hiding; and show signs of severe separation anxiety. (Kathleen C. Basile, Ph.D., 2017)
School-aged children
Children in this age range may feel guilty about the abuse and blame themselves for it. Domestic violence and abuse hurts children’s self-esteem. They may not participate in school activities or get good grades, have fewer friends than others, and get into trouble more often. They also may have a lot of headaches and stomachaches.(Kathleen C. Basile, Ph.D., 2017)
Teens
Teens who witness abuse may act out in negative ways, such as fighting with family members or skipping school. They may also engage in risky behaviors, such as having unprotected sex and using alcohol or drugs. They may have low self-esteem and have trouble making friends. They may start fights or bully others and are more likely to get in trouble with the law. This type of behavior is more common in teen boys who are abused in childhood than in teen girls. Girls are more likely than boys to be withdrawn and to experience depression. (Kathleen C. Basile, Ph.D., 2017)
- 4 million American women experience a serious assault by a partner during an average 12-month period.
- Some estimates say almost 1 million incidents of violence occur against a current or former spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend per year.
- Their partner harassed 74% of employed battered women while they were at work.
- Seventy-five percent of murder-suicides occurred in the home. Also women who are battered are unaware of the effects to the child in my situation it took years to understand what it did to my sweet innocent child who had his innocence stolen from him. ( Alisic, Eva et al.,2018)
Solution
Stricter laws for both parents in a Domestic Violence not just probation and classes for the offender, especially if there are children involved. I believe that both parents should go to classes to understand what Domestic Violence does to the child.
Conclusion
In conclusion, while doing what research I could do I found that some things that were in the study were still sensitive in my situation and it triggered some things, so I hope my paper will help someone. This topic has also been the reason I am so passionate about trying to make a difference in my community and the drive behind my educational journey I plan to graduate with my Master’s degree to become a Probation Officer so I can hold these offenders accountable and try to make a difference.
