Jennifer Kent couldn’t get rid of The Babadook. Kent got the idea for this film when she heard a story about a friend. This friend had a son who thought he was being stalked by a monster and so the mother would play along and pretend to talk to this monster. Kent loved the idea. It was all about facing your darkest shadows and learning to overcome them. Her film, thus, explores many different things such as single motherhood, post-partum depression, and the suffocation of gender roles. The Babadook screams grief and loss and how the suppression of these strong emotions can consume someone. Although the film may, at first, seem a bit confusing, Jennifer Kent, in her film The Babadook, is able to effectively portray grief as she sheds light on the five stages of grief through a horror film which is relatively more approachable for this millennial.
In The Babadook we are presented with this idea of grief and how this horror film is able to creatively incorporate grief. But what exactly is grief? In 1969 we were presented with the book “On Death and Dying” and within it, we were introduced to the Kübler-Ross Method. Swiss-American psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross described the five stages of grief that one can go through when experiencing a traumatic event. The five stages of grief as we know are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. She originally got the idea of these stages when working with terminally ill patients. She noticed a pattern in how they would react to getting news about their death. She then applied this to anyone who may be going through any type of loss. In The Babadook the mother, Amelia, is a symbol of these five stages of grief. She suffers from grief due to the loss of her husband and is left with what seems to be a burden, her son Samuel. Amelia struggles to get through everyday life while trying to suppress all the grief that slowly consumes her. It is not until she begins to own her grief that she is able to heal.
Amelia first experiences denial, the first stage of grief. Quoting from Kubler-Ross and Kessler, Bolden says “Denial. People believe that their loved one has died, but their denial is symbolic in that they cannot believe that their friend or family member will not, for example, be calling to say hello or returning from work at a certain time” (Bolden). In the film, Amelia is at first denying that her son, Samuel, needs help. He is obviously portraying that there is something wrong. Amelia refuses to listen to school teachers and anyone who would suggest that. Amelia is also denying the fact that she is not over her husband’s death. She tells everyone around her that she is fine but there are a million thoughts going on in her mind. Throughout the film, Amelia sleeps with her dead husband’s violin which is a representation of her denial and how she needs a piece of her husband next to her in order to fall asleep. Most importantly, Amelia denies the existence of the Babadook. The Babadook is a manifestation of her own grief, so she is denying her grief. ‘The more you deny, the stronger I get…’ (The Babadook). This is portraying that the more you push your grief aside, the larger It will grow until it completely consumes you. This is prevalent in the fact that it is shown in the film that Amelia has an ongoing toothache which is a representation of that grief that she is refusing to face. “The moral is, like a sore tooth, grief should not be ignored. It will only get worse” (Dagonas). Once Amelia stops denying her reality only then can she move on to the next stage.
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Once Amelia begins to accept the idea of the Babadook she then experiences an insane amount of anger and rage. “Anger. A person’s anger is directed at the person who died or at oneself for being unable to prevent his or her loved one’s death” (Bolden). This quote is interesting because at first Amelia has an ongoing toothache. This is prevalent because this anger that she has is repressed at first and that energy needs to be exerted somehow, so it begins to take a toll on your own body. After that most of Amelia’s anger went towards her son. Amelia believes that if Samuel had not been born that day, the death of her husband could have been avoided. Amelia’s husband died in a car accident on the way to the hospital for Amelia to give birth to Samuel. Amelia’s anger is more expressed when she was being possessed by the Babadook. She is angry with Samuel for calling the neighbor when he was not supposed to. She then kills the family dog, Bugsy. Afterward she runs after Samuel and chases him. This shows the severity of her anger and how far it could go after being repressed for so long.
After all the anger has been released one then begins to bargain, and when that doesn’t seem to be working they break down into what is called depression. “Bargaining. Kubler-Ross and Kessler talk about the ‘what if’ and ‘if only’ mindset wherein individuals who are grieving believe that they may have been able to control and thus prevent the loss of their family member or friend” (Bolden). It seemed as though Amelia was bargaining with the Babadook. She was considering the thought of killing Samuel to maybe not feel as much stress or grief. She realizes that this may not be exactly what she wants. Though her son may be a pain most of the time, Amelia knows deep down that she loves him and would never want to actually get rid of him. There becomes one option, depression. “Depression. In this stage, the authors discuss the normalcy of feeling depressed and affirm the idea that such feelings are necessary for the healing process to begin” (Bolden). Depression was expressed throughout the entire movie, but it was most apparent when Amelia’s dead husband made an appearance. Amelia then broke down into tears expressing how she felt about his death. At this point, she finally realized how much she has been hurting and from this point on, the healing can begin. Only through bargaining and depression can an individual move on to acceptance.
Acceptance is portrayed as the end in most films, rather it is just the beginning. Once and individual reaches this “acceptance” stage they can then begin to learn how to live on with their tragedy. “Acceptance. At this stage, individuals are at a point where they recognize the current state of their lives, without their loved one, as the reality and can live with that understanding” (Bolden). Now that Amelia has accepted the loss of her husband she can begin to live a healthy life with this great loss. Acceptance is not actually what it is normally portrayed as. It’s not all rainbows and butterflies once you accept an individual’s loss. “People can experience virtually any emotion when they are grieving and though healing is always possible; it does not always look like what has been defined as ‘acceptance’ by Elisabeth Kugler-Ross MD” (Sarkis). Acceptance does not mean that they will automatically know how to move on with their lives after a traumatic event rather it means that they can now explore what their life will be like without this person. They question who they will become on their own and that is the true meaning of acceptance.
Moreover, though it may seem that The Babadook is an exact depiction of how grief is, most of the time this is not how it happens. “Research has shown that the stages of grief do not accurately depict how people actually grieve. There are no set emotions or neat stages for grievers” (Sarkis). Most people don’t automatically begin to go through these stages once they experience a life-changing event. Everyone grieves differently. It could depend on what that person meant to you or it could just be the only way you know how to grieve. It takes a lot of time to begin to feel “normal” again. “Grief does not end after 6 months, or a year, or even longer. For many, grief takes a long time and it is hard. Do not listen to anyone who tries to tell you how or how long to grieve. Great love often requires great grief” (Sarkis). Most of the time we depend on the people we love the most to make us feel happy. But what do you do when that person is no longer there? You must explore who you are and how you will be whole again on your own. In The Babadook everyone was telling Amelia how she should feel, everyone expected that she would be fine after her husband’s death. The only person who can determine that is ourselves.
Many might argue that the message in The Babadook was unclear. It may seem this way to some only because you will view the film as what you can relate to most. According to a comment from user chobi61 on IMDb states: “It doesn’t give you a clear message of what this is all about or why these things are happening or how they even started. The mother just read a book to her son and suddenly the monster appears because of the book but nowhere explains how the hell she found it” (chobi61). The Babadook has many different messages portrayed in the film. Each individual will think the movie is about a specific aspect more than the rest because that is what they understand the most. Some might say that The Babadook failed as a horror film because it was more focused on mental issues. “This film failed to decide if it wanted to be a proper supernatural horror or a psychological drama focusing on depression/bereavement”. This may be true, but grief, depression, single motherhood, and postpartum depression are all horrific events. “The Babadook is positioned more within the psychology of horror, and in particular within the area of horror that is traumatic bereavement” (Ingham). I think this is a perfect way to use a horror film. It is often easier for people nowadays to watch a horror film rather than watching something with meaning behind it. The Babadook was able to incorporate both of these ideas perfectly.
This film definitely helps the issue in a real-world sense. Most of us are attracted to things that portray grief. It gives an opportunity for those people to discuss the topic indirectly without using themselves as an example. This film was able to portray the significance of dealing with your grief or one day it will completely consume you. A film can definitely bring change. Whenever I watch a film, I feel like a changed person once I reach the ending. It almost feels refreshing. A great film must be relatable, and that is exactly what The Babadook was. It was able to relate to different audiences through different avenues. After watching the film, maybe someone was finally able to reevaluate what they are hiding from on a daily basis and face it for a change. That is the power of a great film.
