Most people would agree to the fact that no single person is perfect, without even a single weakness. In fact most of us can think of more than just one weakness that we might have and that affects our daily functions, work, progress in life, or our relationships in one way or the other. In spite of this realization, many of our weaknesses linger on in life and we continue to suffer from them. One reason behind this is that the first step to change is not taken:
- Acceptance and Recognition
If one denies an existing problem, one’s suffering continues. The process of transformation starts with the identification or recognition of a weakness and moreover accepting its existence and the need to address it.
Once a weakness is recognized, it is imperative that details such as the exact behavior or thought pattern and other aspects (such as specific events or situations) of the weakness are realized and understood for better defined efforts and interventions, and for greater insight into the problem.
- BELIEVE & HOPE
It takes belief and courage to look into one’s own weaknesses and shortcomings. Once the process has initiated one must continue to BELIEVE THAT CHAANGE IS POSSIBLE to follow through the process of transformation. Belief and hope supply WILLINGNESS & MOTIVATION to continue one’s efforts with sincerity.
- Seeking Advice / Counsel / Mentorship
Change requires immense strength & effort from the person in question. What is also requires is direction, thoughtful guidance and very often encouragement and genuine concern from another person. This person could be a relative, a trusted friend or a trained expert, somebody who has a deep understanding of the person who desires change, the person’s life & history, particular situations in question and is knowledgeable about the specific weakness that causes distress and additional problems.
In addition to support, guidance and knowledge, the person seeking to change gains immense psychological, emotional and relational benefits from this trained guide. We counselors explain this as the benefits of the shared therapeutic alliance.
- Welcoming the Change & Maintenance
To maintain the efforts needed to continue the process of transformation, it is very essential to focus on and to celebrate gradual improvements and benefits being experienced. It is important to realize & celebrate the various mile stones achieved at the time of their achievement. Moreover, it is essential that one continues to remain consistent in the changed behavior and/or thought with a sense of achievement and accomplishment. In addition, guarding and remaining alert against a relapse is of extreme importance. Experts practice certain skills during their termination sessions to facilitate this step.
Helping another person suffering from a similar weakness after one has achieved a good degree of transformation further strengthens the change process.