Gender gap is always an issue of society which no one can resolve as society changes, so the gender roles also change to keep up with modern life. In the essays “Between the Sexes, a Great Divide, by Anna Quindlen and “Being a Man, by Paul Theroux, readers can see how differences are related to gender and how gender stereotypes are common. Theroux explains the differences in a man with a negative view of society. Quindlen describes the distance between the genders that always will be there. Both authors have a strong opinion on masculinity and femininity. Their essays have some points that are similar and some that are different. Human are easily influenced by the impact of society.
Theroux and Quindlen have their strong opinions, so they do not agree with each other about society. In the essays “Between the Sexes, a Great Divide”, we read the story about the divide which she presents as a metaphor of a dance floor. She explains that the divide of the genders is very natural, and whether people want or do not, it is still there, “The boy stood on one side of the room and the girls on the other, each affecting a nonchalance belied. . .” (Quindlen 72). Although the divide is not really bad, she tries to make everyone forget, and she explains that everyone will be better if they do not have any division affecting them. Theroux also resolves to get rid of the difference, and he tries to explain the struggle of being a man.
He does not want to follow the rules in society. From his essay, readers know the struggles to be a man and how he compares men and women. He writes, “It is very hard to imagine any concept of manliness that does not belittle women and it begins very early” (Theroux 167) he knows society wants men to respect women. He uses an example to explain that men do not need to be very manly. He tries to explain the difficulty of being a man, and he does not want to conform to the rules of society. Quindlen and Theroux wish for the differences between the gender to be non-existent. They use a personal example to explain the differences between the men and women and their stress in life.
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Theroux argues that society negatively affects those men who do not want to be mainly, and Quindlen explains that the divide does not make society better. Besides the similarity of the two authors, they still have some different points in the two essays. In the essay by Theroux, readers can see him being so defensive and frustrated. The anger of Theroux shows through his essay’s title, “Being a Man” in the sentences when he says, “Be stupid, be unfeeling, obedient, soldierly, and stop thinking” (Theroux 167). His tone is very strong and angry. He does not like to be a man. For him, the limit of gender about the men in society make them reject their own gender and he feels that, “This version of masculinity is a little like having to wear an ill-fitting coat for one’s entire life” (Theroux 166).
He is disappointed about masculinity, and he thinks he does not need to fit with this. He gives an example of himself “I found it is impossible to admit myself that I wanted to be a writer. It was my guilty secret, because being a writer was incompatible with being a man” (Theroux168). In society, if someone want to be a man, he cannot do something weak or soft. Masculinity is measured by how strong a man is or whether he has many muscles.
In contrast with Theroux, Quindlen is very reflective, and her tone is understanding. She describes how the gap between men and women can be closed, but the biology between the genders is still there. Her tone is not hostile like Theroux’s tone. She describes the dance floor as if the divide between the genders is always still there. Although she is a woman, and she shows her perspective, she tries to understand a man’s perspective. She gives an example about her family with the issue of an amaryllis bulb. She states bot perspectives when her husband and her son ask her, “Why did you put an onion in a pot in the bathroom? His father said later the same day” (Quindlen 73).
For her the amaryllis bulb symbolizes beauty, but her husband and her son think this is just an onion. Because they do not understand her logic, they think she different from them. Though she gives two different perspectives, she is still neutral, and does not blame any specific gender. In contrast, Theroux just gives the reader he perspective of the male, and he does not give any view of women.
In addition, he describes society’s view that men have to follow. His essay brings the feeling for reader of negativity. Unlike Quindlen gives the reader hope that they can live for the most part without the divide between men and women. “Between a Sexes, a Great Divide” by Quindlen and “Being a man” by Theroux use personal examples to show their perspectives. Quindlen gives two perspectives of both genders; for her it does not matter if society has the divide, but it cannot help anyone or make society better. She reviews both perspectives as being very positive. In contrast, Theroux has a very negative outlook on men, and he complains that being is harsh in the society of America because men have to do everything, and they must follow the rules of society.
Theroux and Quindlen believe that men and women have many different roles in society. However they want to remove the division between them, so people can live in harmony with one another. Works cited Quindlen Anna. “Between the Sexes, a Great Divide”. The Norton Reader: An Anthology of Nonfiction, Shorter fourteenth edition. Theroux, Paul. “Being a Man”. The Norton Reader: An Anthology of Nonfiction, Shorter thirteenth edition.
