A precondition to marriage is love, at least most people think. However, in countries like India, Pakistan, and China, love is not a requirement and the thought of love as a requirement is considered too frivolous to base a lifelong commitment on. Amongst traditional cultures, marriage comes first and love precedes afterwards. Arranged marriages work as a system in which the parents and the eldest male members of two distinct families go through a series of negotiations to arrange a marriage between a boy and a girl from their respective families.
Traditional families and religious groups continue this practice, though it may not be as popular in Generation Y as it was in previous generations. Parents pressurize their child to marry the person that has been chosen for them because they believe that they know what’s best for them, and their entire family. Typically, in Western cultures, physical attraction can play a pivotal role when deciding who one may want to go out with. However, arranged marriages are based on the assumption that the young generation seeks only pleasure, but lacks the ability to look at the big picture in an analytical manner.
The factors that are taken into account for an arranged marriage is the family’s reputation, wealth, caste, and can even go as far as considering the individuals hereditary diseases. In this paper, I will argue arranged marriages should be legally allowed in India and encouraged because they produce more successful marriages than marriages that are freely chosen. I support this claim by expounding upon the three major grounds of how it upholds Indian values and traditions of the individuals who are getting married and their future children.
Secondly, it shows deference to parental approval which is a value admired in Indian society because those who are getting married do not have to worry about families agreeing to the individual or not, as the person is accepted by both parties. Thirdly, the practice of arranged marriages reduces the stress of having to date multiple individuals to find a compatible partner.
Then, I will give the argument against arranged marriage which focuses on the drawbacks of arranged marriage which includes: what it is like when love isn’t a priority and how individuals are deprived from exploring their options and not having the advantage of being able to date freely and not be able to freely choose one’s marriage partner. Thus, arranged marriages are superior because they bring together socially compatible people with similar upbringings which removes the chances of any potential disparities. Only those families who believe in the practice should be allowed to arrange marriages for their children, with their consent.
Arranged marriages follow age-old values and traditions and thereby bring the two individuals closer to their roots. The intention is to safeguard the inheritance and legacy of one’s culture and belief system which assures that the man and wife will share the same customs and values. This form of marriage maintains the status quo. For example, my own parents’ marriage was in fact an arranged marriage.
Their marriage was arranged by their family members, typically the males of both sides of their families, and from this arrangement they upheld their caste. The custom of arranged marriages began as a way of “uniting and maintaining upper caste families” (“Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India.”). The traditional caste system of India is one of the world’s oldest forms of social stratification, it dates back to 1200 BCE. The caste system is in which “people of society are born into certain categories that determine their way of life, opportunities or social customs” (Study.com). In the Hindu culture, there are around 3,000 castes and 25,000 subcastes.
The caste system dictates many aspects of one’s life such as occupation, interactions, and dietary habits with members of other castes, and it also sustains one’s social identity. The caste system is virtuous because it is a powerful determinant of citizens behavior and social order. Abiding by the system is necessary because it allows people to live in peace and harmony because they followed the rules of the Indian culture which grants overall happiness for the couple, and the community the individuals are a part of. Not only do arranged marriages preserve cultural values, but marriages made freely do not because they are based on love, and often times different cultures are wedded, and it becomes difficult to practice the culture that each individual is from because they might have to become accustomed to the culture of their spouses, or no culture at all because they cannot reach common ground.