What is marriage? According to Oxford Dictionary, marriage is defined formal union of a man and a woman, typically as recognized by law, by which they become husband and wife. A secondary definition adds, in some jurisdictions a union between partners of the same sex. Generally, marriage could be said as a commitment between two individuals in which the foundation of it is trust, understanding, love, loyalty, tolerance and the list goes on. One of the most important decision in a person’s life is deciding to get married.
When a person chooses his or her spouse-to-be, he or she would have thoughts in their head about building a family with their significant other, having a long-lasting matrimony, dedicating their lives to each other and so on. Lamentably, this road to “happily ever after” marriage life expectation does not become the reality in many individuals live. This is because married couples these days have the tendency to make divorce the first option when they have any issue or issues with each other. Divorce is a legal dissolution of marriage by court or other competent body. It is considered one of the most serious social issues. Sadly, in today’s society, divorce is more normal than ever because of unhappy marriages.
Divorce is not just a grim phase or experience for the partners but also for their children. Often, children are not always acknowledged during the termination and settlement process. Many parents do not realize how much the child or children go through emotionally during their process of divorce. It is too much for the child or children to process especially when the child or children are young.
Divorce between a couple undoubtedly effects their children as well. Although the main objectives of marriage are permanent union and healthy relationship between couples, unfortunate circumstances such as lack of communication, change in the role of women and infidelity do arise in marriage that forces marriage partners to divorce leading to effects on their children such as aggressive behaviour, negative relationship between parents and child as well as not believing in the constitution of marriage.
To begin with lack of communication among couples is not a minor reason as it seems like and this contributes to a long-lasting effect of aggressive behaviour on the children. What happens here is there is lower communication between the couple than usual. This is because both the partners are usually so busy with their own hectic work schedules. Many couples do not have the same jobs or jobs at the same workplace. There are partners who work on shifts in which one of them works in the morning shift and the other works at night. Once they are at home, they are just so exhausted that they will usually just go and sleep.
This does not allow them to see each other let alone spending time and talking to each other. It just becomes worse when one of them forgets special days like birthday of their better half or wedding anniversary. This would seem like the partner who forgot does not care about the other but the actual thing is the partner who forgot did not forget purposely, it was just due to too much of workload and stress.
Sometimes partners feel that just by pay bills, buying gifts and essential things can compensate with time but they fail to realize that that could just possibly just make their matrimonial life weaker. As the communication between the partners reduces, their understanding of each other reduces resulting in conflicts and arguments when they discuss about something. These arguments might just explode into a bigger fight. Both partners would reach to the point where they would feel their spouse does not have the same love and care for them like in the beginning. Alas, the couple makes the decision to get a divorce.
Obviously, this cause has its effect on the child of the couple. Here, when the child witness fights between the parents, the child goes through an emotional roller-coaster. In that there is so much of anger and frustration because these fights can disrupt the attention of the child in his or her studies or any other daily activities. The child’s behaviour eventually becomes aggressive due to not knowing where to vent all the anger and frustration which is inside.
There is high likelihood that the child could become a bully because of this anger. He or she would start emotionally or physically bully others who are weaker as a remedy to his or her frustration. Subsequently, this also has high likelihood that the child might have disciplinary issues in school like not finishing his or her homework, being rude to teachers, bullying others and so on.
This clearly effects the self-discipline of the child which is not beneficial for the child’s present and future. As you can see lack of communication between partners which seems like something slightly, is actually one of the primary reasons of divorce which results in the aggressive behaviour of the couple’s child.
Moving on, change in the role of women also becomes a seed for divorce ending up in children having negative relationship with their parents.