The journey into the future begins in a person’s past. The pressure and expectation to be a certain person can significantly change the individual you become. The pressure may not seem like its important or impactful in a person’s life but, it can affect the future. In the novel, The Kite Runner, we see Baba pressuring Amir to be a strong and powerful individual. The burden of expectations set upon a person during their lifetime will shape them into the person they become. I believe that, young children and teenagers have constant pressure to be a certain person. This pressure comes from many sources, parents, friends, media and teachers.
Children and teenagers are having trouble discovering their own identity within themselves. Children are told that they have to be a certain way, and grow up to be the ‘perfect’ person. Men are told to be tough and masculine, expected to support the family and be the main source of income. Women are seen as being feminine, expected to cook, clean and raise children. In this day and age that’s not true. I know for myself being in high school I have always felt the pressure too have straight A’s and to be involved around the school, when in reality, that’s not the person I am. My mom has taught me to be myself and as long as I try my best, that’s more than good enough.
I think that’s where most kids feel internally conflicted. They have these examples of the perfect student – smart, athletic, a lot of friends, and involved in school activities. Everyone is different and we all don’t have to like or do the same things. In my opinion it’s about being who you are, ultimately being good at being you. In the novel, The Kite Runner, Baba pressures Amir to be able to support himself, to be strong and independent, to grow up to be courageous. Baba hopes that in having this expectation will encourage Amir to follow his lead. If Amir never feels like he is good enough for Baba’s standards it could and will damage his self esteem. When an individual cannot truly express who he or she is they can be confused within themselves.
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Being brought up and having the pressure from friends and family to look a certain way, to be smart, and a well rounded person sets high expectations for themselves. Parents and friends have a certain expectation, and then are disappointed when their high expectations are not met; leading to the individual being self conscience. Amir feels that pressure from Baba as time goes on, not being what Baba expected. Amir makes the statement, “After all, don’t all fathers in their secret hearts harbor a desire to kill their sons?” (pg.29). Amirs father, Baba, is loved by everyone. Baba treats Amir as if he is different, not living up to the expectations set upon him. Baba blames the passing of his wife; Amirs mother, on Amir.
Baba constantly questions Amirs masculinity and the ability he has to not only take care of himself, but others. When Amir says that quote (pg.29) I believe that’s how he really feels. When you disappoint a person that is important to you it feels awful. A time when I felt like I disappointed my mom was when I got caught shoplifting. When the security guards called my mom, my immediate reaction was, “she is going to kill me.” I knew she was not going to literally kill me. I felt like I disappointed the one person that would love me through everything. I think that’s how Amir feels, constantly disappointing the one person who has unconditional love for him. It is easy for me to relate to how Amir feels because he is brought up only by Baba, and only having one parent creates an instant pressure to please them constantly. Baba expects Amir to in a sense, make up for killing his beloved wife.
Baba expects Amir to follow in his footsteps, making sure he lives up to the high expectations of others. Throughout all of this, he limits Amir in becoming the person he wants to be, and the person he truly was. I think for Amir, and other children, if they’re brought up not knowing who they really are, it will carry on with them into the future. They will not know who they are, only what they are expected to be. Having a pressured childhood can change a person’s future. In conclusion, having expectations placed upon you for many reasons can alter your future. It can change a person’s outlook on life and what they see as right from wrong. In the future, a person may carry guilt from never living up the expectations placed upon them. Amir has a misdirected idea of who he is supposed to be, ultimately changing how he feels about his father. Expectation in persons past can lead to a misguided future.
