Mommy Where Are You?
Mama!Mama! I yelled those words when you weren’t there. For my birthday’s, when I could ride a bike without training wheels, my first volleyball games. You weren’t there. Why’d you leave ? Daddy and I were miserable without you. I hate to say it but I love you. I just wished you could’ve been there like a normal mommy. Since you’ve been gone I feel empty. I wonder if you sing the same or if you still love to cook. I always wonder if I would be different if you were. Just please come back now mommy.
Abuelito’s Flowers
Abuelo was my superman ,my everything. He loved me and I loved him. Everything was perfect with abuelo until the sick came. Abuelo wasn’t Abuelo anymore. His skin became leathery and pale. He would never speak , all he would do was just smile and close his eyes. It frightened me. I have never seen abuelo like that. I didn’t want that to be him . I wanted my superman here with me. I wanted to hold him and hold him and hold him. And to never let go. Death has scared me now. Seeing how abuelo was I didn’t want that for anybody.
First Butterflies
I can remember the first time I fell in love. He looked at me and I looked at him with curiosity. With his smile as white as stars, he took my heart away. I can remember the way i felt. The times i saw him I would get the butterflies everytime he was around me, like I was in a fairytale and him and I were the only ones there. TIme would stop when we were together and the moment was just right. It was the little things i missed, like the long facetime calls, soft little embraces he would make stupid little jokes. Our love was something you would only find in the movies.
Nightmares
Sometimes I wonder how it feels like to runaway. To not wake up and live in a world of dreams. Just for a day. Maybe in my own world where I won’t be torn to the seams. I could be anyone I want to be. I could go on adventures and maybe even get the guy. Where I won’t be judged. To not deal with the lies. Where trouble won’t be delivered to me in a shiny, silver cup. Well,until I wake up , how nice it would be. My world with only me.
Growing up
I miss the days of hopscotch and hula-hoops. The days when we were care-free. The days when everyone was your friend. I miss playing tag. I miss when we giggled about boys we liked. I miss the bright colors and silly songs. I miss that. But when did we lose it. When did crushes become serious? Why are the colors muted and songs no longer fun to sing? Why did we stop? Was it because I simply grow up? Is this what adults go through? I surely don’t want this. I want to jump rope and play tetherball. I want to dress without caring what other people think. I want to sing loud and proud. I want to giggle and have fun. I don’t understand why I can’t. Is it the judgement?Maybe. I don’t know.But what I do know is I’m going to start a war with growing up. I won’t give up on anything.
Carpet
The carpet was hard. It’s burgundy color earned a spot in my book of memories.Sleeping there wasn’t bad though. If you were lucky you would wake up without a rash. You’d also be lucky if I didn’t kick you in my sleep. But you’d have that refreshing feeling of sleeping on the floor,right? I didn’t understand the carpet stains, I didn’t understand that carpet rashes were abnormal. I didn’t understand we didn’t have a house. I liked my carpet. I loved my “house” . My carpet had my footprints, my tears, and my memories. I loved it.